Assalamualaikum, hi. This post is about Boba and Cengkih. Again. Dah setahun dah both of them pergi tinggalkan saya. Time flies, but the rindu somehow stays. I still miss them, and yes, I still talk about them like they’re still here. Ada hari, I scroll balik my gallery, slow-slow cari gambar gambar depa. Just to look. Just to remember.

Last year was really hard for me. Sedih tu berat, macam duduk dalam dada and refuse to go away. It took me almost a year nak stop menangis every single day. I remember one night so clearly, I missed them so bad, and my life masa tu was so messy. I really wished I could hug them that night. I doa, minta Allah hilangkan rasa berat rindu dalam hati. Just for that moment, I wanted some peace.

Of course I love them. I never want to forget them. But the rindu was too much to carry. I asked Allah, please pujuk hati yang sedang rindu Boba dan Cengkih. That night, I dreamt of them. Mimpi main dengan Boba, dengan Cengkih, like nothing ever changed. I woke up crying, but at the same time, rasa lega. Like my heart finally breathed a little.

After that day, the rindu is still there. I still look at their photos. I still pause a bit longer when I see their faces. But I don’t cry like before. Now, I can see their pictures with a small smile. A quiet one.

Walaupun sekejap, I feel so grateful. Bersyukur sangat sebab Allah bagi peluang untuk saya jadi teman yang baik untuk Boba dan Cengkih. Orang selalu cakap, we might have many cats in our lifetime, but for a cat, their whole lifetime is just us. And that thought always breaks me, in a gentle way. I’m thankful Allah jentik hati saya untuk cari kucing as my companion, and those cats were Boba and Cengkih.

Setahun berlalu. Luka maybe dah tak berdarah, but parut tu masih ada. And I think that’s okay. Missing them is just another way of loving them, quietly, from afar, and forever.

Signing off with a heart

that still remembers for

Boba & Cengkih, always🤍🐾

Nadiera Hashim

8:12 p.m

Kedah, Malaysia.