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Assalamualaikum and hi everyone. Growing up, I found myself trapped by the weight of silence. I am the youngest one in my family, bongsu, so I learned from an early age that speaking my mind was often seen as disrespectful. In my world, speaking out was met with disapproval, so I kept my thoughts to myself, fearing what others would say. Consequently, I lost my voice, hidden beneath layers of silence and self-doubt.

From my youth, I absorbed the unspoken rule that speaking up was synonymous with rebellion — especially at home. I learned to suppress my thoughts and feelings, fearing rejection or punishment if I dared to express myself. This silence became my shield, protecting me from the discomfort of confrontation. In silence, I am safe.

As I grew older, the silence only grew louder. I watched as others confidently voiced their opinions and asserted themselves while I remained on the sidelines, afraid to draw attention to myself. The fear of judgment and rejection kept me firmly rooted in silence and invisible in a world that seemed to value only those who spoke up.

But the consequences of my silence were profound. I struggled to form meaningful connections. I am trapped in a cycle of passivity and insecurity. Opportunities passed me by, as I lacked the confidence to pursue my dreams. Silence became a barrier to my own growth and happiness.

It hinders me to let my emotions out. I’m not very good at telling people how I feel. I’m used to keeping it to myself. Even when I’m hurting, I remain silent. I deal with my feelings alone.

Nobody will even dare to listen to me, so I just don’t talk.

That’s when I realized that the loudest scream is the one that remains unheard. What’s seen or heard doesn’t always show the whole picture of someone’s struggles; the most intense pain can be kept hidden silently, where silence speaks the loudest.

It’s unfortunate — I mastered the art of being silent even when there’s a lot to be said. 


Wishing you bright stars and moon, 
Nadiera Hashim
10:30pm
Kedah, Malaysia.

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About me

About Me

Nadiha, a 25-year-old girl who tends to overthink things, so I find solace in expressing my thoughts and feelings through writing. I have a deep affection for green tea, the vastness of the sky, rainy days, adorable cats, and all cute things.

Dear Allah

Dear Allah

Dear Allah, please give my parents a long life, good health and always keep them under the shade of Your Mercy & Protection. Have mercy upon them as they brought me up when I was small.

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